What It Means If She Doesn't Call?

Lily: Why would Natalie hang up on you?
Ted: I don't know.
Barney: Did you sleep with her sister?
Ted: No.
Barney: Did you sleep with her mom?
Ted: No.
Barney: I'm losing interest in your story.

You're having one of those days when you're thinking about the last cool girl you met, how you two had a great time together, how you'd love to meet her again and how the universe is seemingly conspiring against you guys meeting again. She seemed truly interested, but then you never heard from her again. Why does this happen for so many men?

Here are my top 5 reasons why certain women might not want to call you:

1. She was Busy: However hard our analytical minds might not want to believe this, its actually a big reason why girls don't call back. However, watch out for the eternal 'Oh-I-am-so-busy-always' kind of girl - they will not find time to grab lunch with you even when you let them know two weeks in advance.
   
2. She was Just Being Polite: Ever exchanged numbers with someone who seems interested, gave you the right number but never returned those calls? Well, she was just being polite dude. Translation - she does not want to hook up and you gotta move on. A simple thumb rule is to never try to make contact too soon, and wait between the trials. If the girl does not respond after three genuine attempts, its her loss. Say that loud - ITS HER LOSS!
3. She was Confused and Needs Time: There might be instances when you meet her and have a great time but on other days, she is just PMS-ing (defined in #3 here) over text/phone/in person. It’s fine to casually ask in a playful way, “I’m curious since you’re kinda cute -- are you dating anyone interesting right now?” Invite honesty from women and you might get lucky. If you wait and wonder, you’ll end up wasting your own time and energy. Give her time, if she is still talking and meeting you, she is interested in you. Everyone is allowed mood swings but don't let yourself be the Intellectual Whore - you might not be destined for the second ladder with certain girls.
4. She's Lost Interest: She was interested in you at first, but something happened along the way to change her mind about you. In this case, maybe she sensed some anxiety from you that she didn’t know how to figure out or handle. Or maybe she sensed a bit of desperation (“You’re going to call me, right?”). Communicating either anxiousness or desperation early on before a woman knows you is a sure attraction-killer. Relax. If she’ll call she’ll call. If not, you know she wasn’t the right one at the right time.
5. She's Just a B**ch: Well, enough said. Maybe she was just looking for a fling, for a casual encounter that you misinterpreted as being something more than what it was in her mind. In either case, the saying Angoor Khatte Hain* applies and you're free to bitch and forget about her.
   

Or you could just take the 'don't call her again' approach like Barney: ""What? Saying sorry to her would involve talking to someone I've already had sex with - which frankly is like changing the oil in a rental car".

:-)

ps: Feel free to add any good point in the comments section.
*Angoor khatte hain

Literal – Grapes are sour.

Meaning – Denial of the desirability of something, after one has found out that it cannot be reached or acquired.

Weight Loss: Yes You Can!

Looking back at my previous struggles with weight loss, it is not difficult to understand why it took me 8 months more than my expected time period to lose weight. That is a long time! But losing 25 lbs is much easier than keeping it off - it needed a lifestyle change. Yesterday, as I stood on the weighing machine, it felt good to be back at the weight I was in May 2007.

158 lbs.

And I'd like to share some very minor changes in my lifestyle which DID WORK! Believe me, I am the last person who would give up on good food or not eat out. I still do eat out a lot, go to parties, eat a controlled amount of junk food but haven't gained weight in the past 300 days. I am writing only after being convinced that some of the points stated below DO ACTUALLY WORK!

1. Gimme My Life Back- Its the Mentality: Losing 25 lbs and keeping it off was never going to be easy. However, I did REALLY WANT to be healthy, proactive and lose that extra flab. I did not view losing weight as a punishing regime, rather a detox exercise to get back my good health. That's it - straight and simple - I dragged my body to the gym/court/playground and the mind followed.
   
2. Do Your Homework: I did a lot of background research and experimented with various exercise routines before settling in with what best suits me and my body. All of us are built differently with varying tolerance to exercise and physical stress. Talk to your body and determine where to draw the line. Read about a healthy and balanced diet and slowly replace meals with healthier options.
3. Don't Kill Yourself over the Math: I lost 87,500 extra calories over the past 11 months - that's a little over 2 lbs in a month (1 lb ~ 3500 cal). In the beginning it might sound great to lose weight quickly, however, the body has a natural and safe rate to lose it. Although I did get motivated seeing big numbers on the 'Calories burnt' counter, I quickly realized that I was burning myself out on occasions and never returned for long periods.
4. Enjoy the Routine, Talk about it and Reward Yourself: As I started to exercise regularly (3-4 times a week), I thought of it as fun and enjoyed the time as a major stress buster. I started making friends who themselves were trying to get healthy and we encouraged each other from time to time. I bought myself a pair of 32' jeans, 2 tight fitting party shirts amongst other items as incentives to keep the weight off. Nothing feels worse than buying expensive clothes and not being able to wear them coz of your size! :-)
5. Eat: This might sound illogical but I eat a lot after all my workouts. I make sure that I get plenty of saturated fats, proteins, fibre, carbs and vitamins. I am willing not to lose weight but cannot compromise on eating food - period.

Here's a time line with certain activities I involved myself with over the past year or so.

Evidently, unlike my previous attempts, I never relied on one activity to enjoy and hence never let it become a single point of failure. For example, I started running and training for a marathon in May. My knee popped. I was sad. I joined the Washington Cricket League and started playing a lot of cricket. The season ended. I was sad again. I found a racquetball partner until September (after which his semester as a Phd. student took over). I went to India in October. Ate a tonne there yet still lost weight. Why? No beer. Point noted - I removed beer as a means to quench my DAILY thirst. Come November, I did cardio in the gym alone. I was sad again coz I hate doing cardio alone. I found another racquetball partner in December through Craigslist. I haven't looked back since then. Point being - I never stopped completely.

If I can, so can you! Talk about it, set achievable goals and just do it. It feels great to be healthy again...

"I know what Victoria's Secret is. The secret is that nobody older than 30 can fit into their stuff."